Dad, Can you….?

During our lifetimes we have all started a conversation, or a question with “Dad? Can I….” It is not a bad way of starting a conversation actually, because it shows that you want Dad’s input or his permission in some area of your life or for something that you would like to do or even as a preamble to asking for something like a gift, whether it is for your birthday or Christmas (if you celebrate it).

What I like to hear from my son is that he would like to do something with me. It doesn’t matter what it is. If I can do it, I will go anywhere and do anything with him as long as I feel that I am wanted…needed in his young life. The reason that I say this is because there are so many father/son relationships which are strained or even broken for whatever reason.

Kids need their fathers. They need them to be in their lives, maybe not 24/7 but they need them nonetheless. It doesn’t matter for what reason, it can be for any reason but children, boys and girls, need their Dad. I barely had one when I was growing up because of a divorce that happened when I was only five years old. Of course, I thought it was something that I did, and something that I could fix. I found out later that wasn’t the reason, that I was not even part of the reason for it. I grew up angry and resentful because of it, mainly because I was so young that nobody thought it was a good idea to tell me exactly why this had happened when I got old enough to understand. Dad’s usually are good at helping kids understand things, especially when they are around.

My point in this is that our father, our Dads are important and should be in our lives, not only when we are young but when we get older as well. I know of many who are taking care of their Dad now because he is older, because he needs his children. Is it too much to ask of us as children to be there for the man who was there for us? If your Dad wasn’t around while you were growing up, maybe you can get together now. Try not to hold a grudge against him, there usually was a good reason for his absence.

Our Father, the One in Heaven, would also like to be in your life. The difference between our Heavenly Father and our Dad that we have here on earth is that we must choose to have a relationship with Him. In some kids lives, they may need to choose to have a relationship with their earthly father as well, but that relationship is important too. God wants a relationship with each of us and He is always with us. His presence in your life can be felt and known at any time regardless of where you are. The reason behind His presence in your life is because He wants to be, but you have to choose to allow Him into your life.

In order for us to have a real relationship with God, we have to come to Him through Jesus. When we do that, we can have a relationship with God forever, not just while we are alive here but when our body dies, we will wake up in His presence. Isn’t that awesome!

That doesn’t mean that we will be in “church” forever. We will be worshiping Him but in other ways, we will be serving Him in whatever ways that we can. The difference in Heaven will be that we have the knowledge to do what needs to be done and we will have eternity to do whatever there is that needs doing.

By choosing to have a relationship with Jesus, you get a relationship with the Father too. He has loved each of us from the beginning, not of our life but the beginning of time itself. He has known you from long before you were ever born or even before the world, earth, was created for us to live on. His love, His compassion for us is so far beyond our comprehension that it is hard to explain. As the Scripture says, “my ways are higher than your ways, and my thoughts are higher than your thoughts”, God is simply saying that He is perfect in His knowledge of all things above and beyond what we can know. He is not bragging, it is just the truth!

This Father’s Day, think about your father, your Dad and then really think about having or starting a relationship with God, your Father in Heaven. Life is too short to waste it on stuff, our relationship with our family, both here on earth and the family that we have in Heaven, is far more important than is given credit in our culture today. Give both of your Fathers your attention so your relationship with them doesn’t have to end. Think about it.




Everything in life revolves around remembering things in one way or another. We remember birthdays and anniversaries and holidays and what to pick up at the grocery, most of the time. What about the people who have lost so much already this year, will we remember them and their sacrifice? Those who have gone to war, not for the first deployment or the second but the third or fourth. What about those who have gone for their last deployment, the ones who won’t be coming home? Will we remember them and pray for their families?

There are so many in the military of our country who have given so much of themselves and their families have given a lot as well. Some have even given their lives for their country and the job that they held as military men and women. Does our country, our “President” consider their honor and dignity enough? Does he honor them and help their families without asking for anything in return because they have already given enough?

I don’t know the answers to these questions. I do know that many of our men and women in service have given more than their fair share and our government should be proud to take care of them no matter what it costs. Many from earlier wars are still scarred in ways that we will never understand. Many have taken their lives and left their families to pick up the pieces because they couldn’t make sense of it all because of PTSD.

I have had and may still have symptoms of this illness even though I have never been to war. You see, firefighters, policemen, paramedics and many others suffer from it too. But no one ever hears about us because we are not on the “front lines”, we are not coming home with our legs blown off or our arms missing. Our injuries are mental in nature because we see horrific scenes at shootings, at wrecks, at house fires. We see what happens when a friend or family member decides to murder the rest of the family. We see the children of people who drive drunk with their kids in the car and have to pick up their children to take them to the funeral home, while mom or dad is recuperating from a cut on the head that they don’t remember getting.

The only real cure for this illness is time and the love of God. He is the only one who is capable to repairing and healing a damaged mind which was torn by these images. Many in public service like I was never admit to having this. People just ignore it and go on with their lives not knowing what will happen, but living with the consequences just the same.

Our society doesn’t understand that some of the most horrifying crimes are committed by close family members. Sometimes the reason behind that may be a mental problem that wasn’t addressed or even admitted to anyone. So nobody knew that it was there until it was too late.

God can heal all of the wounds that we have, but we have to be willing to admit that we have a problem and come to Him for help. We have to give our lives to Jesus and let His healing power come over us and through us so that the healing can begin. If we don’t do that, we will always have problems that we can’t identify, or won’t.

Many times, some of these same mental problems are caused by our own families. In broken homes, children of divorced parents witness what happens when their parents go separate ways. There is resentment, anger, frustration, fear, guilt, doubt, blame and all of this is sometimes piled on a child who is not even old enough to know what they are. Later on the child feels and understands a little but will blame themselves for the break-up of the family, until they are much older.

Sometimes we never get past the hurt and all of the emotional baggage that comes from a divorce and will carry it with them the rest of their lives. Still, God is the only One who can really help. Turning to Jesus and giving the frustration and all of the problems that you have grown up with will help and He will make a difference in your life and in your family’s life too.

The memories that we have to live with and grow with sometimes cause problems but those memories can also bring us hope and peace. Memories of Christmas and family. Memories of good times that our family has had and memories of the tragedies that we have had to endure as well. Give your life to Christ and let Him heal the hurt and all of the baggage that has come with it. He will make a huge difference in your life and in the lives of others.



Its hard to describe the job that she does best.

She makes your bed, and fluffs the pillow

so you can get a good rest.

She makes the menu and serves the food,

whether you like it or not, but most of all

she does what she does from the very same spot.

Every day your Mom gets you ready for the days

to come.

But what would we do in our lives,

if we didn’t have a loving Mom?

God shows His love for each of us through our mother and through all the things that she does for each of us. She is His representative in each family, so that we can see Him through the care that she gives to each of us. Honor your mother every day for the things that she has done in your life and thank God that He prepared her to do the things in your life that make you into the person you need to be.